Saturday, July 14, 2012

How it All Got Started

Not everyone is up for adopting.  For me it started at around age ten.  My cousin James was in the hospital.  Why, I don't remember.  What I do remember is his roommate was a baby with all of his limbs broken.  I just kept talking to him, touching him, etc.  I didn't even pay attention to my cousin.  (Sorry James.)  I asked my mom what happened to the baby.  She said that his mom (a big woman) sat in him and broke his limbs.  Whether that was the real story or not I asked my mom if we could take him home.  Of course we couldn't.  The baby never left my heart.  How could someone do that to a baby?  I felt so helpless.

Fast forward, to marriage.  Hubby knew going into our marriage that adoption was something I would like to do and we talked about it here and there.  Most of the time it wasn't something real in depth, more just two people in love talking about things they'd like to do.  Dreaming, some would call it. 

This is the part where it gets hard to explain without writing a book.  So I may just do point statements as to how God changed/worked on our hearts.

*The need to adopt became strong, for me, again about a year ago.
*I was really trying to figure out what God wanted for my life.  Where He wanted me to go.  I know I wanted to help people, preferably special needs kids. 
*I wanted to adopt.  Hubby didn't.
*I started checking into going to school and getting a degree.  While most of that seemed interesting, I didn't have total peace about it.
*We got a call about one of my pregnant cousins.  The Dr.s told her that her baby may have Down syndrome.  They may be weighing out their options.  (Later we found out differently.)  Right then and there, I said "That's it. We'll adopt the baby."  From then on I knew God wanted us to adopt a baby/child with Downs.  (I will write another post about how God changed my heart in that direction.)
*I talked more and more about adopting to hubby.  He wasn't budging.  He'd politely listened like I listened to his hunting stories.
*As adopting was REALLY weighing on my heart and not on hubby's, I cried out to God to change his heart or take this heavy burden away.  I prayed this over and over and over.
*Hubby started to seem more interested, ask pointed questions about adopting, about down syndrome, etc.  He was so interested I told him more than once, "Why don't you just say yes, you're so close."  I really thought he was going to say yes.
*The kids knew I wanted to adopt and at one point a few years ago they did too.  Then they weren't too hip with the whole idea, especially the Down syndrome part.
*I tried and tried to get involved volunteering with people/kids with special needs.  With no luck.  Until my dear friend gave me a number of a family here who have 5 special needs kids (4 adopted).  We met.  I got involved with Special Olympics.  God confirmed that love for kids with Downs.  Our son has even taken a liking to two of the boys.  We talk about one them all of the time.  He is a character!
*About 4 weeks ago, hubby changed his mind.  I was devastated.  Ready to give it up.  I cried.  I went for a drive.  I begged God to change one of our hearts.  I couldn't bear to carry this weight around if it wasn't going to happen.
*July 2nd, hubby and I went for a drive.  He told me that God moved on his heart during my grandpa's funeral and yes we can adopt.  I have to be honest here.  I didn't get all excited, kiss him or anything.  I was shocked.  He had just said no three weeks earlier.  I kept asking him, "You're for real?"  "You're not going to change your mind?"  He was for real.

We told the kids the on Wednesday.  They knew it was coming.  They had mixed reactions.  But I have already seen God move on their hearts prior to this.  So I know He'll move even more.

So, why adopt?  Why us?  Why now, when we are in our 40's or very close to it?  Why "mess up" our life?
Why not?

Please follow our adventure in this whole process.


shelly said...

What an exciting time for your family! There will be ups and downs...never fails that the battle is strongest the closer you are to God's will!!! We will be praying for you and your family.

As far as the what if's....what if you live a totally ordinary unmessed up life and miss experiencing The Biggest Blessing? God asks us to do radical-crazy to the outside-things, but He'll never ask us to go it alone! Can't wait to see how this comes into fruition :)

Chloé said...

What a breathtaking process, and how exciting for your family!! I can't wait to follow this amazing aventure!!